Exit from anxiety
Yeesi's summer intern Kamilla writes about her feelings and thoughts about the Spring lockdown caused by the pandemic. She writes about her methods for fighting anxiety in her daily life during that time.
During the corona-virus situation in the Spring, I was wondering why I am feeling so down, and how could I improve my mood bit by bit, day by day.
It was strange, that even if I was following the suggestions of numerous health care professionals - who created a checklist of best practices in the time of social isolation- yet I was not able to gain back my positive mood or be more balanced at least. Organizing my day according to a self-made schedule caused a great level of anxiety. I wondered why... Usually, It must be practical. Feeling more and more down I decided to call our school study counselor. I am so grateful that it was an available option. It was such a relief to talk to someone, I guess I was not comprehensible, I jumped from one negative thought to another. Only by listening to my voice, I could realize that I had a lot of irrational, self-generated mantras in my head, that possibly made my situation worst. After the first session, I had a clearer mind, and I started to think about my life-hacking plan, which brings back some contentment in my life. My “list” looked like this:
1. I gave up on daily schedules, or at least I reduced my goals for a day ( I identified a couple of things that I would like to do, but all of them were optional )
2. I started to paint and draw a lot( I got some canvases and watched videos on who to use different brushes, and mix the colors on the palette )
3. I went to “Zen”. Self-compassion got lost somewhere, in the black cloud above my head, so I sat down, and meditated every day some 10 minutes.
4. I enrolled in a so-called "science of well-being course". I think it was one of the best decisions I made during the “black hole” period because positive psychology was always my interest, and in the course lectures, there was a lot of discussion about personal strengths, mindfulness meditation, misinterpretation on what we want and need, etc.
5. Being present and using my imagination. It was an important one. In general speaking, I am not a technology-oriented person, however, I wanted to challenge my biases, and try new things out. I attended different webinars, casual talks, and deep discussions online that helped me feel reconnected a bit with the world and myself.
6. Taking gratitude notes. Every day I thought about things I am grateful for. Simultaneously I practiced loving-kindness meditation, which calmed me down, and opened a bit my heart.
7. Walking in Nature. I live in a nice, green surrounding, close to an artificial hill, that I climbed from Monday to Sunday. I noticed that this activity generated positive change in me. Being silence with my thoughts while I was observing them, helped me to identify where the root of my problem is.
8. Reminding myself to time-affluence. I started to prioritize my time over money. I accepted the fact that some difficulties might come over time, however, I could still do simple things that make me really content.
What helped you during the social-isolation? Have you learnt something about yourself since the pandemic arrived to Finland?
Kamilla Fodor, Yeesi’s intern